We have all found ourselves in moments where we have been desperate for help; we did not know what to do, which decision to make, which direction to take in our lives, which job to go for and so many other questions.
In these moments we crawl on the floor from pain, beg for an answer or a sign, ask and talk to friends and strangers about their experiences desperately trying to find in their words some support, compassion or an indication of our answer. We drag ourselves in agony from place to place trying to get some or a answer that will help us and give us some relief of the agony. Everything becomes so intense and heightened from that place like our life is in danger and we have to make the 'right', the 'life and death' decision that is either going to make us happy or sad for a long time.
In today's western societies we are so programmed to think in black and white terms that we tend to forget that there is a 'middle' way. We either feel that we have to be completely independent and do everything by ourselves or we will be dependent on others for love, help, support, company etc. The closest edge or pattern to us makes us feel good,safe and/or in control that we have what we need and we will be ok. And then something happens and our world crumbles a bit and we are not sure what to do, what exactly we need, what we are 'supposed' to do, trust ourselves and listen to others. Sometimes the confusion is so strong that we can not hear anyone's voice, mainly ours and we would rather stay in bed all bed and hide away from everything, from pain, fear, anxiety; we want to do anything to leave that place, drink, take drugs, talk about other things, watch tv, destruct ourselves in every possible way.
And there comes the moment when we realise that we can not hide anymore and need to take action and the action would be to get some help; but what kind of help. There are so many things out there, so many modalities, kinds of therapy, coaching, healing, psychology, energy work, clairvoyance, astrologists, mediums, spiritual coaches and so many others. Hundreds of programmes, online webinars, courses, How the hell does one meant to make a decision being already confused with one's own life.
And here it is, that amazing video on Facebook where the coach gives this amazing hints and promises clarity, abundance, love and happiness if one follows that programme. Of course, that can be the solution you think as it is not support, it is not weakness, it is a method, a course, a tool. You sign up for it and day in and day one, you commit to that work. To work through your difficulties, your 'negative thinking' patterns, your 'negative feelings', your 'anger issues', your continuous stuckness with the past. You meditate, do the exercises, reflect, you almost become that ' washing machine' who learns to choose what to keep and what to through away. You see the coach as this is amazing person who has done so well in their lives, they have got such clarity, they have so many answers, they are enlightened and thank god, you say, you find them to give you such an amazing help.
Indeed they might give you some help, tools, inspiration, guidance, positive regard etc bu ultimately the help is all within you! What you might have called period of depression, or feeling low or not having much energy could be a period of retrospection, a period when your soul contracts from being out in the world and seeks a quiet place to grow a new cell, to draw a new plan, to just be and recharge for the next project, mission, phase.
I have seen many people wanting a quick fix, a quick solution, to jump from one phase to the other, from one project to the other, form one relationship to the other, from a happy moment to the other, from one achievement to the other. Life, luckily, in not just the accumulation of our wants and desires. It is much bigger than that and it involves all phases, stages, states of being. How we can grow, if we don't know how is it to shrink, how we can small with all our being, if we don't know how the tears and sadness feel like, how we can truly love if we don't know what hate feels like, how we can achieve, if we haven't failed.
There is no good and bad in life, there are just experiences.
So maybe next time when you desperate try to find for answers and help from experts, when you seek to get out from a difficult situation or a painful state, when you seek solutions right now otherwise you are miserable, ask yourself what is that wants to come through?
Vulnerability? Let it come through.
Sadness? Let it breath through you.
Confusion? Let it overwhelm you.
Fear? Let it paralyse you.
It is in these moments that you will need your internal expert, father, mother, child, angel, guide, guard, hero to show up and hug you, love you, accept you, appreciate you, consult you, be with you. Access the support, don't resist it, it wont make you weaker, quite the opposite, it will bear you the gifts of strength and wholeness.
It lives within you and it has never really abandoned you, you might have temporarily turned your eyes to another expert, guide, helper.. externally.